Of Pidgeons and Bugs
by Lizmun
Summary: Iruka had taken care of Naruto up until he graduated as a Genin. However, Naruto still needs his sensei to teach him the ultimate lesson... The meaning of the birds and the bees.


Pidgeons and bugs.... A Naruto Fanfic By Lizmun  
  
Rated: eh... PG-13 or whatever Disclaimer: Naruto and others don't belong to me. Iruka, however, will soon be mine *cackles evily*. Oh yes... he will be mine. *clears throat and looks around* Um... hehehe. Although, after all this Hell that I'm going to be putting him through... I don't think I'll be on his list of top favorite people. But then again, we'll see.  
  
Comments and Criticism Wanted: Please apply within.  
  
Anyway, as for the timeline where this occurs... er... let's just say it's quite early on... just after Naruto graduates the academy. Or if that's not believable, I claim the right of AU! With that said, let's get on with the story. Warnings: So many cliché's you can shake a stick at!  
Poor use of verb-tenses and grammar and punctuation throughout the story.  
Characters may or may not be OOC. Please proceed with caution.  
Lastly, just to let you all know, I'm trying my darnest to keep my yaoi-ish tendencies in check here. I really just want to make a cute, innocent story and leave whatever romance out of it. (Which is ironic considering the subject matter.) But if you still find the hints... er.. well... *points in the air* Look! A dead bird! *runs away*  
  
~~~***~~~  
  
It couldn't be helped.  
  
Countless stacks of completed and semi-completed homework towered menacingly over Iruka's desk, teasing the poor teacher over his predicament.  
  
Sometimes the young man wished that he had studied further and became a Jounin, rather than being stuck here, having these seemingly innocent pieces of paper cruelly mock him.  
  
At least then no one would think twice about the teacher's sanity if he happened to tease back.  
  
Leaning back on his chair, the teacher let out a tired sigh/yawn and stretched his arms behind him. He needed a break. He couldn't wait until the latter end of the school year when there was less paperwork and more technique learning.  
  
As for now, he simply needed to be more patient.  
  
With a frustrated groan, Iruka placed his hands against the edge of his desk and pushed himself away from his work. Perhaps a little distraction and some food would help him concentrate better. After all, it worked for Naruto.  
  
Iruka smiled at the mention of his former student. Sure there had been times, during his teaching career, when he had felt like pinning the poor boy against the wall with his shuriken (in fact, there probably was a time that he had done so), but he couldn't help but be inspired from the boy's determination and carefree view of life.  
  
Still, despite the overwhelming sense of pride he felt after thinking of his charge, Iruka couldn't help but wonder if Naruto was his punishment for his own actions when he had been that age.  
  
"What goes around, comes around, I suppose."  
  
Taking a brief moment to file away the papers, Iruka pushed the chair back into the desk and exited the room, making sure the lights had been switched off after his exit.  
  
Iruka casually took a few steps into the hallway before pausing cautiously at his surroundings. He had felt a presence nearby, but just who, other than himself, would be foolish enough to be in the school at this late hour at night? Not to mention why they would want to infiltrate a small academy? His only guess was that some student wanted or needed blackmail on another and had perhaps broken in to steal some test scores. Of course, last time that had happened, it was Iruka himself who had done the deed.  
  
He smiled ruefully at the memory.  
  
He had been caught and, in punishment, he had been forced to run around the village twice for every test score he, himself, had failed. With a slight blush of embarrassment, he remembered it had taken him a full day and a half (nonstop) to complete the punishment. It wasn't that he was slow in speed... he just wasn't really the brightest student in school at that time.  
  
A soft shuffling in the teacher's lounge brought Iruka back to the present at hand. He let out a curse under his breath. Here he was, practically standing uselessly in the middle of the hallway, while someone was probably going over important and confidential documents.  
  
Quietly gliding towards the teacher's lounge, Iruka slipped out a few shuriken from his pouch and prepared to fling them in case the situation turned to be something much more dire than previously anticipated. Quietly Iruka slid the door open, just enough to peer an eye at the room, barely making any sound in his movements.  
  
His eye caught sight of the intruder, and he felt his other eye twitch in annoyance. Not even bothering to hide his presence, Iruka slammed the door open. His teeth were clenched, and he could feel the familiar throb of migraine coming back. With a voice as cold and eerie as a winter's ice-storm, he called out to the delinquent student before him.  
  
"Na-ru-toooo!"  
  
The voice had the desired effect on the mischievous blond. The boy froze in his actions. Apparently history loved repeating himself, for as Naruto pulled away from the file-cabinet, Iruka could see a student's file in his hand.  
  
Naruto had barely enough time to retract when a shuriken flew through the air and impeded the file onto the wall, preventing the folder from being taken.  
  
"You're not going to find anything against Sasuke in that file, Naruto." Iruka then made his way to the cabinet and pulled both shuriken and files off the wall. Sure enough, it had been Uchiha Sasuke's file. Naruto perhaps felt he could have found something within Sasuke's permanent record. Probably the blond boy had become fed up with the other's teasing and needed some good blackmail material.  
  
Not that he would find anything. Sasuke had bee one of his best students, and one of the quietest. The only thing bad that had been written about him was when a teacher recommended a bit of counseling for the student's "over-excessive angst".  
  
Still, despite his understanding at Naruto's predicament, that didn't mean Iruka was going to let the boy get away with it. After all, it wasn't fair that he wasn't able to.  
  
Iruka paused again and shook his head, mostly to himself. He found it slightly humorous that with age and responsibility, he had become the one person he swore never to be when he was a kid.  
  
Turning back to the boy, Iruka swung the files within his hands and whacked Naruto upside the head.  
  
"What are you doing here, Naruto? Don't you have training early tomorrow?"  
  
Naruto just pouted and rubbed his own head while glaring childishly at his former teacher. The injury was a far whisper of pain compared to how his pride felt.  
  
*It wasn't fair,* Naruto thought to himself. *So close. Not only had Iruka-sensei caught him, he also hit him with Sasuke's file! Even in paper form, Sasuke got the upper hand. Damn bastard!*  
  
"Well?"  
  
Looking back at his former teacher, Naruto couldn't help but laugh sheepishly at the situation. Reaching his arm back, he lightly scratched the nape of his own neck in nervousness.  
  
"Well, you see... I wanted to talk to you, sensei, but you were too busy with all that paperwork that I decided I would wait for you until you were finished, but then after five minutes you still weren't done so I just wanted to do a bit of exploring. Is that a new coffeemaker? Anyway now that you're here can we go for Ramen? I'm starving! There wasn't any food in the fridge here. What happened to all the boxes of ramen cups you kept in the top shelf? I'm hungry! So can we go now? Please Iruka-sensei?"  
  
Iruka couldn't help but roll his eyes drolly at the younger boy. He had returned the file back to its place while the boy ranted, however his mood had changed from "exhaustingly frustrated" to "humorously irked". What could he say? The boy had a natural talent to distract the anger away from him.  
  
Still, the boy needed to be punished.  
  
Without warning, the Chunin teacher wrapped his arm around the recently graduated Genin and pulled the boy close to his torso. The boy, having been treated to this punishment already, widened his eyes in dread. Trying to squirm and push himself free from the hold, all Naruto could really do was protest loudly as Iruka's free arm came down and rubbed his knuckles vigorously against the blond's hard head.  
  
Satisfied that justice had been served, Iruka let his protesting captive free and stood back to appreciate the highly peeved expression of the young ninja.  
  
Inwardly, Iruka felt a pang of melancholy hit him. He really wasn't Naruto's teacher anymore, now was he? He really didn't have any right to punish the boy as his instructor. Of course that didn't mean he couldn't punish the boy as his caretaker or as a brother-like figure... still the loss of the role made the scarred man a bit uncomfortable and, truth be told, a bit scared. Thinking he was probably being foolish for his thoughts, the man kept a simulated smile and made his way to the door, motioning the boy to follow him.  
  
"C'mon. I don't think Ichiraku is closed yet."  
  
Naruto, clueless to the inner thoughts of the man before him, frowned at the change of expression. It wasn't really that big of a change, but he figured he knew Iruka-sensei enough to know which smiles were his real smiles were and which weren't. Sure he was annoyed as hell when he got that noogie, but the happy, playful expression on Iruka's face made it almost worth it. Not like this other one he had on at the moment.  
  
However, at the mention of his favorite restaurant, Naruto decided not to think anymore and have fun with the Chunin while he enjoyed a bowl... or three... of ramen. By now they were halfway to their destination. Iruka strolled casually down the dark, quiet streets, his eyes never leaving the sparse number of stars above. Frankly he preferred watching the sky from the roof of his house, or more preferably out in the forest, away from all the city lights.  
  
He remembered when one of his fellow teachers told him, after being caught staring off into space, that if he had hid the scar and headband, he would look almost like an older version of Nara Shikamaru.  
  
He didn't know whether to be insulted or honored at that, so he responded with his usual shy blush with nervous chuckle.  
  
Bringing his attention down earthward, he looked back down towards his companion. Naruto had his arms folded behind his head and he too had been staring up at the same sky that Iruka had been looking at. However, the difference was while Iruka had stayed quiet, Naruto was happily singing an unknown tune about ramen.  
  
"Ne... Naruto-kun? What did you want to talk to me about?"  
  
Iruka watched as Naruto slowly unfolded his arms and looked away. That was odd. The boy had been in a cheerful mood just moments before. Iruka couldn't help but worry about what the problem might be. Just when he was going to ask again, Naruto looked up sheepishly, a slightly forced smile spread across his marked cheeks.  
  
"But sensei, I can't tell you yet! We have to talk about this over my favorite meal! That's how it's supposed to go!"  
  
Iruka simply raised a confused brow at the boy.  
  
"How is 'what' supposed to go, Naruto? What is this all about?"  
  
With an exasperated sigh, the blond genin turned to face the confused chunin. His posture was one familiar to Iruka. It was one he himself used on Naruto when trying to talk sense into the kid. His hands were on his hips, and his body was tilted slightly forward... an exasperated expression was on his face while one hand would reach up and push the hair back. Ah... there... yes, Naruto had done a good job mimicking him, he thought to himself amusingly.  
  
"I heard some parents talking together in the market when I was going for some milk. She was talking to another lady and they were being all secret-like, so I hovered around trying to listen. Maybe they were talking about a secret ninjitsu or something. I thought if I learned this secret skill I could use it on Sasuke!" Naruto paused and looked up at his former instructor, seeing the impatient stare the man was giving him. "Ah... right. Anyway one of the ladies said that she was going to give her kid "the talk" tonight or something. Now that he had "come to age" he was "ready to know" and that it was important for him to know about the "birds and the bees" and that. She also said she was going to tell him over his favorite dinner. Ne, sensei? What is this "talk"? Is it some sort of hidden jitsu using bugs and chickens? Maybe it's like that Shino guy's... right? Ne sensei? You look pale, are you okay? Hey! The Ichiraku! There it is! C'mon Iruka-sensei! Let's eat before they close up!"  
  
Grabbing Iruka tightly by the arm, Naruto dragged the poor man to their usual stool, ready to chow down on his favorite meal. He couldn't wait to hear what kind of technique this "talk" had. Since only after hearing it late in the afternoon, he couldn't wait to ask Iruka-sensei about it.  
  
Iruka, on the other hand, looked up to the sky and sighed mournfully at his fate. He supposed he deserved this. This was probably his punishment for posting up those risqué pictures of Kurenai all over town back when they were kids. Of course, it had all been Asuma's idea... but he was the one coerced into doing the deed.  
  
Plopping down beside Naruto, who was already into his second bowl, he ordered a small bowl of seafood ramen. Not that he was that hungry anymore.  
  
"Hey you pervert! That's mine!"  
  
Surprised by the outburst, Iruka turned towards Naruto and the supposed offender. The "pervert" was none other than Team 7's current sensei, Hatake Kakashi. The silver-haired jounin was currently holding a long strip of broth-soaked beef away from the reach of Naruto's chopsticks.  
  
"Ah, you must be Hatake-sensei." Iruka gave a friendly smile to the new instructor, slightly tipping his head down in a polite greeting. Kakashi simply shrugged a greeting. Iruka found it quite rude at the response, that and the lack of interest in knowing his name. Naruto, turned away to glance at his former instructor then back to his newer one, only to gape as Kakashi's cheeks were a bit fuller and the item, within the chopsticks, went missing.  
  
"How did... but wait... Argh! No fair Kakashi-sensei! Iruka-sensei! I demand another bowl of ramen! I wasn't able to get full since pervert- sensei here took some of the meat!"  
  
Iruka simply grinned and nodded. Leave it to Naruto to find any excuse to get another bowl. He was used to it by now really. While ordering another bowl for Naruto, Iruka couldn't help but smile at how Naruto was interacting with his new teacher. Just from the fact that Naruto was yelling at the poor jounin gave Iruka some proof that the man would be a good teacher for the boy. First off, Hatake-sensei must have known that Naruto was the fox demon. Every adult in the village, whether new or old, learned about it one way or another. They just weren't allowed to mention it to any of the children. The fact that the teacher wasn't giving the boy hateful glares nor avoiding the boy, whether it was due to his secret or perhaps the boy's character, meant that it wasn't a big deal for the new teacher. At least then Hatake-sensei wouldn't be to biased or harsh against Naruto when it came to training.  
  
With a sigh of content, Naruto finished his third bowl, turned his back on the bar and leaned against it, patting his full stomach. Iruka couldn't help but glance down at his half-full bowl. He would probably save the rest for later tonight. He needed to refuel to finish up those papers tomorrow. But for now, he was just content to spend the time with Naruto. It was a nice quiet moment, Iruka thought to himself. Of course any moments with Naruto, somehow, were always bound to go awry.  
  
"He's not your sensei anymore, you know."  
  
Iruka and Naruto both turned to stare at the unperturbed, one-eyed ninja. Kakashi, with a bowl of ramen in front of him, stirred the contents idly with his previous pair of chopsticks, not bothering to look up at the bowl to view their reactions.  
  
Iruka looked away and simply mumbled a soft "sou ka" and gave a slight empty smile to hide his hurt expression. True, he had been thinking of mentioning it to Naruto that the boy didn't have to call him "sensei" anymore... now that the boy had graduated and moved on to a newer teacher... but he had wanted to at least say it with a bit more calm and truth-be- told, a bit more tact.  
  
Naruto, on the other hand, didn't mind expressing his emotions fully. With a quick jump to the stool, one leg propping on the bartop, Naruto glared downwards at the irritating jounin who didn't even bother to look up to the looming threat.  
  
"Don't you be saying that about Iruka-sensei! I don't care what you think! He'll always be my sensei! Nothing's going to change that! Even when I'm hokage, I'll call him sensei! And I will be hokage, just you wait! Heck! I bet you're just jealous! That's why you don't want me to call him sensei? Eh? Eh? Isn't that right! Iruka-sensei is way better a sensei than you'll ever be! Why do you think I went for him instead of you to learn about the super-secret ninjitsu talk?"  
  
Iruka didn't know whether he should just repeatedly slam his face on the bartop or make an immediate escape home. Although both had their good points for the moment, he preferred not to escape... at least, not until after he paid the bill. It had taken him quite the effort to even be allowed near to the Ichiraku due to the pranks he had pulled back when he was a kid. He didn't think that the owner would still be pissed at him after so many years. It was just a joke... who couldn't appreciate the humor of chakara-induced ramen stuck to the ceiling. He thought it added a bit to the décor.  
  
Looking around the shop, Iruka gave a slight sigh of relief to find that they had been the last customers of the day. He didn't want to cause any more trouble for the owner. Reaching up, Iruka tugged down at Naruto's sleeve, wordlessly asking him to sit down.  
  
"Naruto. It's alright. He does have a point."  
  
Naruto looked down in shock at Iruka, almost as if he had been betrayed by the man's words. Furrowing his brow at Iruka, Naruto almost gave him a glare, but instead just gave him a childish pout.  
  
"I don't care! I'm still calling you sensei, whether you like it or not!"  
  
At this revelation, Iruka couldn't help but feel touched at Naruto's actions. He, himself, had been afraid that the lack of connection of being sensei would distance the boy from him. Being called "Iruka-sensei" by Naruto had almost become second-nature to him, even though sometimes he acted more like a big-brother rather than a teacher at times. Yet, despite the closeness he had with the boy, and despite his own big-brother tendencies, he couldn't help but feel uncomfortable about asking the boy to call him "nisan," much less "san", or "kun". The idea of being called with a different honorific somewhat made his stomach clench. In fact, sensei had become a playful endearment for the both of them. He remembered back when they had both met, Naruto would make an exaggerated and appalling tone whenever he called him "sensei". Of course Iruka had hated that and would chide the boy... but soon, as they grew closer, it became more like an inside joke, or rather a nickname.  
  
Naruto never had a family. Iruka never had a sibling, and had lost his family early on. Neither of them exactly knew what their growing relationship meant, so "sensei" had become a safe term to call it. After all, how bad would it make both of them feel, if they called themselves brothers, yet they both did not know the first thing about acting like so. It was very unsettling.  
  
"Super-secret ninjitsu talk, eh?"  
  
Iruka turned back again towards Kakashi. He couldn't decipher the expression on the jounin's face. He had thought he had caught a glimpse of humor in his expressive eye, but it could've been something malicious or probably constipation for all he knew.  
  
"Oh, it's really nothing, Hatake-sensei," the chunin waved his hands about, dismissing the matter.  
  
"Hmm... now I'm really curious." At this the Silver-haired man disappeared from his seat and now stood behind Iruka, hovering menacingly over the poor school teacher. "Umino Iruka, eh?" Kakashi almost looked like he smiled humorously at Iruka's reaction to the jounin knowing the younger man's name, what with the eye curving into a slight arc. Of course, it could've been dust in the eye.  
  
Iruka was really starting to hate that mask.  
  
Kakashi continued his interrogation undeterred. "Well, Iru-kun... Do tell. What is this super secret you're hiding from us?" Already Iruka crossed out "Iru-kun" on his list of names to be called. Nope, he didn't like that name one bit. How dare this man be so informal? It was annoying!  
  
"Yeah! C'mon Iruka-SENSEI!" Naruto glared at Kakashi, just daring the white-haired man to defy his defiance. Observing that he only received a casual glare in response, the boy turned back to the shifting, scarred man on the barstool. "I want to learn it now so that I can kick Sasuke's ass tomorrow!"  
  
"Er, well... speaking of which. Shouldn't we get you back home? I'm sure the owner would like to close up now and..."  
  
"Oh don't mind me, sensei, I'm quite curious about it myself." Iruka looked up to see the owner walk towards them, bill in hand. With a defeated sigh, he reached into his pouch and paid the amount. Wait a minute. That had been the price of five bowls of ramen. He had eaten half, and he knew Naruto only ate three this time... but where...?  
  
Oh he really disliked Kakashi at the moment.  
  
With a tired sigh, Iruka moved away from the stool and patted Naruto gently on the shoulder.  
  
"C'mon, it's getting late. Ah-uh-uh! No "buts" Naruto. Let's go!"  
  
Naruto, in turn, grumbled loudly as he hopped off his stool. Punching his fists deep into his pockets he cursed under his breath as he started to make his way towards the exit.  
  
"Kuso... I'll never learn the birds-and-bees no juitsu at this rate." Naruto pushed up the curtain of the entryway and exited out into the streets. Iruka wasn't so lucky in his escape. It had started with a choke, then a cough. Flushed with embarrassment, Iruka turned back to watch as both Kakashi and the shop owner huddled down to their knees. Both of them were shaking from the shoulders and then it spread throughout their bodies. With strained movements, Kakashi rose from his huddled form and leaned against one of the empty stools. Kakashi then turned to look at Iruka. The scarred chunin didn't need to take off the jounin's mask to know the expression on the silver-haired's face. That grin was visible from beneath the cloth.  
  
"Birds..." Kakashi started, his voice strained severely, almost like it hurt to speak.  
  
The store owner, however, simply let out a muffled choke.  
  
"...and bees..."  
  
By now, store owner had collapsed onto the ground. Had it not been for big toothy grin, Iruka may had been worried that the two were poisoned or something. Oh how he hoped that was so instead.  
  
"... no juitsu?"  
  
That had done it. The two full grown men collapsed onto the ground, rolling on their backs as they let out huge whoops of laughter. Tears began flowing from their eyes (well, single eye from Kakashi) from how their chests were tightening from lack of oxygen.  
  
Mumbling, under his breath, how he wished they'd turn blue and pass out, Iruka stormed out of the Ichiraku, his face burning in mortification.  
  
He met up with Naruto a few feet from the shop. Naruto had been waiting for his sensei to follow, but was now looking quizzically at the restaurant's directions.  
  
"Ne, Sensei? What's going on in there?"  
  
Iruka simply shook his head and with a gentle push on the blond's shoulder, the teacher directed Naruto towards the direction of the boy's apartment.  
  
"It's nothing. Let's just leave those two idiots be for now." No, Iruka did not feel like playing the role of the polite, honorable, gentle sensei tonight, not that anyone would blame him.  
  
Their venture towards Naruto's home had been psudo-quiet indeed. Perhaps a bit peaceful had it not been for Iruka's periodic mumbling about withering scarecrows and nosey shop owners.  
  
They had reached the apartment in silence, and Naruto quickly made his way in, leaving his sandals thrown against the entry. Iruka simply shook his head good naturedly and commenced with his usual chores whenever he was in Naruto's home. He gathered all the shoes he could find and placed them in a small row on the entrance. The toes were pointed outwards, and each set stood slightly apart from the other. This was done mostly so that should the need arise, a pair could easily be slipped on and the boy could be quickly out the door.  
  
The next task was to tidy up the room a bit. With one hand, Iruka began to gather up any clothing sprawled carelessly on the ground. At the same time, with his other hand, he would gather up any scrolls, weapons and empty cups of ramen laying about. These were tasks he had grown accustomed to doing since he first ventured to the small living space. The older man didn't mind doing these chores, on the contrary, he felt compelled, that as his role of Naruto's caretaker, it was partly his responsibility to help out... that and the fact that Iruka was a bit anal when it came to cleanliness and order in the home. Tonight, however, he was only going to do a brief version of his chores, just enough to be able to walk freely on the floor.  
  
Naruto, by now, had already showered and dressed for bed. The boy simply grinned expectantly at the younger man, who in turn, just sighed residing himself to his fate.  
  
"Alright alright... c'mon, I'll tuck you in." Leaving the items he had gathered on the floor in two separate piles, Iruka followed the bouncing genin to his room. By now, the boy had already crawled under the sheets. As Iruka sat on the end of the bed, he gave a pleased sigh of relief to find that the sheets looked relatively clean. The scent of laundry soap was lingered on the fabric.  
  
"Ne... sensei. Will I ever learn what the "talk" is about? Maybe we should try again tomorrow? This time, let's find a quiet spot! What do you say? I know, maybe out in the woods! Then you can show me the moves without anyone interrupting us... especially the pervert-sensei!"  
  
Iruka hung his head, trying to hide the extreme blush covering his cheeks. Oh if only Naruto even had a clue of what he was saying and how it sounded like right now. Ah well, he may as well get it over with right now.  
  
"Naruto? What do you know about love? Tell me... what does it mean to you."  
  
The boy in question simply sat up and quirked his head to the side in confusion. Then rubbing his chin in though... another act Iruka had been known to do countless times... he turned to his mentor and responded.  
  
"Love... I guess... is supposed to be when you really like something very special to you and can't live without it, at least that's what Sakura-chan says. If that's the case, well then I have to say that I love Ramen! And food! And being a ninja! I also love you sensei! And I like Sakura-chan a lot a lot! Is that love? I don't like Sasuke, he's such a bastard, so he's not on my list."  
  
Iruka could only nod. His face was slightly flushed from Naruto's frankness. He gave the boy a soft smile then cleared his throat getting the boy's attention.  
  
"All of those have within themselves a different type of love, but it doesn't mean that one's worth less than the other. Each one is special in their own way, but the type of love I want to know from you... well... let me ask you this. Is there someone right now who, you feel, makes your stomach clench? Someone who makes your heart race and your face turn red whenever you see that person? Someone, who makes you feel warm? Someone who while makes any coherent thoughts vanish from your mind, still becomes the one person you can't stop thinking about?"  
  
Closing his eyes, Naruto seemed to muse over the questions. Just when Iruka thought that Naruto fell asleep or something, the boy stood straight up, as if in shock. With a pale and horrorfied expression on his face, he slowly turned to Iruka-sensei.  
  
"I... I thought it was the rotted milk! It can't be him! He makes me so mad! He thinks he's so cool and I just want to kick his ass since Sakura- chan likes him better than me! He hates me! I know it! He's always glaring at me... well he glares at everything... but he's always insulting me, ignoring me...SENSEI! I don't want to be in love with Sasuke! He's a guy! That's just wrong, right? Anyway, I don't want to be in love with someone who hates me! Please say I got it wrong! I want to love Sakura-chan!"  
  
"Ah, but love is blind, Naruto-kun! Sometimes you don't get to choose who you're in love with."  
  
Both Iruka and Naruto turned to the new voice. There, casually propped against the slightly-open windowsill, leaned Kakashi with his ever present book in hand.  
  
Naruto's reaction to what Kakashi said merely caused the boy to crouch to the bed and wail in agony. Iruka felt a severe twitch near his forehead. Turning to the silver-haired jounin, Iruka sighed and gave the man an irritated glance.  
  
"As much as that is true, you're not helping right now in the situation, Hatake-sensei.  
  
"Must we be so formal, Iru-kun?" Kakashi lowered the book from his face and directed his one eye at the young man on the bed. His eye curved in mischevious merriment... or sadistic pleasure, Iruka wasn't sure. "After all, we shared a meal; it must mean we're buddies or something! Please, just Kakashi would be fine."  
  
Iruka had a few names he would like to call the man right now, but he thought one bad influence in the boy's life was enough.  
  
"Fine... Kakashi-sensei," Iruka paused as it seemed the name left a bitter aftertaste in his mouth. "But in return, if you must, please address me as Iruka-kun rather than Iru-kun. Thank you."  
  
"Aww, and I was hoping you'd have a cute name for me too... like Kashi- kun or something. No fair." The older man tried to put out a cute, puppy- dog pout... but the effect was ruined as the mask covered the expression. Now pouting for real since his effort was wasted, Kakashi sighed, shrugged and went back to reading his book.  
  
Iruka sighed as well, but for different reasons. Turning back to the anguished boy, Iruka gently placed his hands on the blond's shoulders and pushed him till he was sitting upright again.  
  
"Naruto, look at me."  
  
The boy sniffled pathetically and shifted his face upwards, just barely enough to glance his soggy blue eyes at the soft brown ones above.  
  
"Now, I have just something more to ask. Does this person, who you think you love, make you happy? Does this person, despite any pain and suffering they may cause, make you feel like you would forgive them without a moment's thought, even if they never ask you to?"  
  
Iruka tried to hold back a laugh as Naruto's eyes and expression turned slightly hopeful.  
  
"No..."  
  
"Well..." Iruka continued, reaching up a hand to playfully ruffle the freshly washed blond hair. "Then maybe it's not love after all. Listen... Kakashi-sensei was right in the fact that it doesn't matter who you fall in love with. It can be a girl or a boy. Just remember one thing; love is a special and sacred thing. It can both destroy you..." Iruka paused as a flash of images of his parents and lost friends quickly streamed in his mind. Shaking his head he turned and smiled at the boy. "... but it can also make you stronger. When you find that special person, I know you will treasure that person deep within your heart. That's just the way you are. All I can ask of you is to just take things slowly. There is no rush to do anything. And if you find yourself confused about anything, just remember, I'm here to talk if you need it alright?"  
  
Naruto nodded, wiping a tear from his eyes. Reaching up he grasped Iruka in a tight hug, then snuggled back into his bed, a loud yawn signaling his exhaustion.  
  
"Arigato, Iruka-sensei. One more question though..."  
  
Iruka paused in his decent towards the exit. Turning around he gave Naruto a questioning look.  
  
"What does love have to do with birds and bees?"  
  
Iruka faltered in his step. With a flushed face he began to stammer up an explanation when Kakashi stepped forward.  
  
"Think of it as a code, what parents tell their kids, or what senseis tell their students." Turning about Kakashi gave a playful wink at Iruka, who, in return, just shifted his eyes at the older man.  
  
Pleased with the answer, Naruto nodded to his both teachers then closed his eyes to catch up on a bit of sleep. Iruka smiled at the sight then turned to push Kakashi out and leave the boy in peace.  
  
It wasn't until a few moments after the two men exited, and shut off the lights had Naruto reopened his eyes, staring at the ceiling for the moment.  
  
"Man... and I really hoped to learn a new trick to beat Sasuke with. Oh well... maybe tomorrow.... I'll get *yawn* lucky, and Sakura-chan will be nice to me then. That would be nice." Pulling the sheets closer to his chin, Naruto nestled against his pillow, and within seconds fell into a deep and peaceful sleep.  
  
~~~***~~~  
  
*Crawls from the pit of sap she just emerged herself in.* Blaargh!!! Hehe. Well, I hoped you like this little piece of mine. You can't imagine how many times I wanted to just break it off into chapters or something. Still, I figured... I never finish my chaptered stories... and I always finish my one-shots! XD Still, I got a sequel already festering in my mind. Just a short story of Kakashi getting to know Iruka's a bit better. It may or may not be yaoi, depending on one's interpretation of the story, just like this one turned out to be yaoish in the mind of a fangirl. Speaking of which... I know I kinda failed in leaving off the yaoi-ish hints... but it's so imbedded into my head, it was hard to completely abstain. Still, I hope it wasn't too bad.  
  
This was my first Naruto fanfic. I had gotten the muse from a second-hand store. Seems the Muse used to work for the Ranma section. I might keep him though; he is kinda cute for a Muse XD Comments and Criticism wanted. People's reactions will help me decide if I should do the sequel or not. It wasn't pre-read, so there's bound to be a plethora of mistakes. *bows, letting the sap still drip* Thank you anyway for making it this far. 


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